hej jag är valentine och jag är fransk!!
i like wearing lipstick because you leave marks on literally everything omg. kiss a boy’s cheek? my boy now. drink out of a cup? my cup forever. don’t even think about having coffee out of that thing. it’s like marking your territory
hello 911 I want to report a theft. yes. A cutie stole my heart. No. I just want the cutie back. They can keep my heart. Okay. Thank you. Yes. I’ll stay on the line.
so did u like my post because it was funny or do u wanna date me i need answers
i’m so fucking jealous i fucking hate it my heart is racing
mom: so how do you know this person?
me: *struggles to come up with plausible fake story instead of saying “on the internet”*